Many people have asked how I'm dealing with my cancer journey and what is the worst part.
Was it hearing I have cancer? No. In fact my Urologist said, "The tests show... well, you know." He didn't want to say it. But that's what it was.
Was it my surgery? No. The surgery itself was easy, and the pain had subsided after about 5 days.
Was it finding out I still had cancer? No. While I was highly disappointed, I was ready to take the next steps which were radiation.
So, was it the 37 radiation treatments? No. The treatments themselves are easy. You just lay there. I have to say though, the side effects of hot flashes are a beast at times.
No, the worst part of my healing journey through cancer is... the Fear! Even though my cancer is now undetectable, fear still visits me.
I've seen that fear cripple a couple of my friends who are also battling cancer with one becoming homebound with fear for over 2 years!
But I am so thankful for every single prayer. Everytime I started to become overcome, that peace that surpasses all understanding sweeps over me.
And in those moments that fear still creeps it's way in, I turn to my favorite Bible verse in Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Then I pray, "Lord help me to believe what I say I believe, That YOU are with me and will see me through!"
That's how I'm getting through my journey, I pray it helps you in yours.